Scene from a Parked Car

Scenes from a Parked Car


By Rob Hing

Scene: Interior of a parked ’53 Chevy.  Dimly lit.  Five men sit, obscured by shadow.  Marvin (offscreen).”Lorenzo, hit it.”

Marvin extends his hand to Lorenzo. Closeup of hand and smoking joint as he passes it from rear driver’s side seat to Lorenzo in the driver’s seat.

Lorenzo, still obscured by darkness. turns slightly and takes the joint.

Lorenzo, large permed hair and all, turns back straight ahead and takes a puff.  He exhales slowly and hands it to his right.  The passenger looks slightly over and graciously accepts the joint before puffing.

Scene is clearly the interior of a ’53 Chevy.  The camera focuses on the man in the rear driver’s side seat..

He is wearing a light blue tuxedo suit, and he is watching the passenger take his drag thoughtfully.

Marvin: ” It’s pretty good shit, right?  I told you my hook up was right on.”

The sax man nods as he inhales and then passes back to the bass player behind him.

Marvin looks over to Bass player, then continues: ” I found this guy through my cousin- ”

Lorenzo turns and cuts him off: “Oh Ch-” (he begins questioningly)

Marvin puts a smooth hand on Lorenzo’s shoulder: “No brother, you don’t know him.” His eyes say shhhh.

The bass player exhales and hands the joint back to Marvin.

The short man in the middle seat exhales.

Short man: ” Yeah, but what were you crying about a second ago? ”

Marvin accepts the joint and gives the short man a contemptuous look: “I wasn’t crying about nothing.  I’m trying to teach you about the business, and I was telling you about why these gigs wreck my nerves.” He inhales deeply..coughing a bit as he hands the joint to Lorenzo.

Lorenzo: ” Aw man, these peckerwood kids are as quiet as mice… This gig is no sweat.  We come, we play, we go home and smoke some grass.” Lorenzo looks satisfies and motions for Marvin to pass the joint.

Marvin:  “That’s the thing. ” Marvin eyes Reggie in contempt. ” That is the thing.”The camera zooms in on him. He takes an extra pull from the joint.  Eyeing Reggie as he hands the joint to him.  ” These kids don’t hear us, brother.  They are out here in their starched clothes trying to kiss Miss. Poodle skirt and Mr. Penny loafers.  They don’t hear our music.  We would get more appreciation if we were playing to a crowd of deaf people. ”

Unseen sax player in the back seat: ” Deaf people would have more rhythm. ”

The men (except Marvin) snort and chuckle.

Lorenzo looks back to them:  ” I can hear those boys counting steps out on the dance-floor.  It’s messing up my timing!”

Marvin:  “Shit, I asked the boys what tunes they liked, and they said Mickey and Minnie mouse!”

The car erupts in laughter.

Marvin receives the joint as it returns in the order of the rotation:  “Man they wouldn’t know what key-”

A loud thud is heard, followed by the slamming of the trunk.

Lorenzo is seen peering out the rear window.

Marvin watches as Lorenzo opens his door off camera.  He follows Lorenzo as he turns towards the trunk.

Lorenzo is seen through the rear driver’s side window.

Lorenzo: ” Tha’ hell are you doin’ to my car?!”

All four men can be seen briefly in the car.

White boy off camera: ” Hey beat it spook, this don’t concern you!”

All the men open a door and emerge from the car.  From the now empty car interior Marvin speaks.

Marvin: “Who you calling, Spook, Peckerwood?”


End scene


Fragrance of…would smell like


Adam Sandler- Bologna, hotdogs, and farts.

Andy Samberg- the same but with a hint of puke, and other secretions.

Russell Crowe- Grease, Kangaroo, and Beer soaked beard.

Harrison Ford- Chewbacca

Chewbacca- Samwell Tarly (seriously)

Angelina Jolie- Tea tree oil and old photographs

Sylvester Stallone- Turpentine, gunpowder, and spaghetti

Danny Devito- Wet dog, old orange soda, and a filet-o-fish

Jessica Alba- Every different fruit blended, subtly, and Irish Spring soap.

Lebron James- Tears and testosterone

Kevin James- Tears and mashed potatoes with gravy

James Worthy- Championship rings

Keanu Reeves- Eunagi, gunpowder, and incense

Michael Keegan- Chainwax and crispy socks

John Goodman- a wet football, deflated.

Kristen Bell- Idk. Milk and cookies?

Michael Keaton- Batman

Mark Hamill- Throat lozenges, Bactine, and old spice

Emily Blunt- Refrigerated eggs

Tom Cruise- Swamp water, fire, and blood. Interview With The Vampire, was a pretty good movie.

Adam Sandler Movie Quote Matchup

Adam Sandler Movie Quote Matchup
Adam Sandler Movie Match
Write the letter of the correct match next to each problem.
1. I thought we were watching Scooby Doo. a. Big Daddy
2. It’s a tie. That guy doesn’t count. He can’t even read. b. Little Nicky
3. You probably don’t remember me but I went to high school with you. And I, um, kinda gave you a hard time back then, and, uh, I did some things I thought were funny at the time, and realized they were just mean and stupid. And I just called to apologize and hope you forgive me. c. Happy Gilmore
4. Want me to wipe the leaves on your ficus tree…Pres…tone? d. The Wedding Singer
5. Left! Left! No, Left! e. Big Daddy
6. Hey, Peanut Butter Cups! f. Mr. Deeds
7. We win! Group hug in the shower tonight!… or not. Or not. g. Billy Madison
8. Good idea. School is for fools, look at me Hahaha… h. Mr. Deeds
9. “He’s losing his mind…..And I’m reaping all the benefits. [Smiles and disappears behind curtain] i. 50 First Dates
10. Oh, well, now your back’s gonna hurt, ’cause you just pulled landscaping duty. Anybody else’s fingers hurt?….I didn’t think so. j. The Wedding Singer
11. I’m sorry. I used to be much stronger. k. 50 First Dates
12. You’re in big trouble though, pal. I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! l. Billy Madison
13. No, sir, I have no experience but I’m a big fan of money. I like it, I use it, I have a little. I keep it in a jar on top of my refrigerator. I’d like to put more in that jar. That’s where you come in. m. Mr. Deeds
14. Good luck with the nipple rubbing! *- I don’t need luck, I’m good! n. The Wedding Singer
15. Awww, he’s choking. We should leave. o. Happy Gilmore
16. Captain Insano shows no mercy p. The Waterboy
17. Look, forgive me. It’s just you are DROP DEAD, CRAZY GORGEOUS! So much so that I’m actually considering looking at you again before we finish up here. q. The Waterboy
18. The were Cones! r. Billy Madison
19. Friends listen to “Endless Love” in the dark. s. Happy Gilmore
20. Callahan Institute is the leading brain injury clinic in the Pacific Rim. We are funded out of Sandusky Ohio by T.B. Callahan, the automotive components tycoon… t. Happy Gilmore
21. It’s all in the hips. It’s all in the hips u. 50 First Dates
22. Fine! Do whatever you like. What would I Know, I’m just a doctor. v. Little Nicky
23. I’m stupid. You’re smart. I was wrong. You were right. You’re the best. I’m the worst. You’re vey good-looking. I’m not attractive. w. 50 First Dates
24. No son of mine is gonna play any foos-ball. x. Spanglish
25. Are you staring at me or her? ‘Cause you’re starting to freak me out. y. The Longest Yard
26. What Momma don’t know won’t hurt her. z. Happy Gilmore
27. Hip…Hip Hop….Hip Hop anonymous? aa. Happy Gilmore
28. Sharks are like dogs, they only bite when you touch their private parts. ab. Billy Madison
29. It’s all in the hips. It’s all in the hips ac. Spanglish
30. Knibb High football rules! ad. The Wedding Singer
31. If you’re gonna stay home today, you can help me shave my armpits ae. The Waterboy
32. Who would you rather bone, Meg Ryan or Jack Nicholson? af. Mr. Deeds

90’s Movie Quiz…Cameo appearance version.

90’s Movie Quiz…Cameo appearance version.


90’s Movie Quiz…Cameo appearance version.

Rules:  The actor lists contains any actor who appeared in the movie (long enough to be recognized).  In some cases the featured actor(s) may be omitted because it would be too easy to guess the movie.  The point of this quiz is to guess the movie by the various cameo appearances it contains.  Good Luck!


Actors in the movie: Dan Akroyd, Chris Farley, Adam Sandler, David Spade, Jason Alexander, Sinbad, Jan Hooks, Tim Meadows, Michael Richards, Jon Lovitz

What Movie?

Hint: One of the themes of the movie is illegal immigration.


Actors in the movie:  Natalie Portman, Jack Black, Jack Nicholson, Annette Bening, Michael J. Fox, Pierce Brosnan, Pam Grier, Sarah Jessica Parker, Jack Nicholson, Jim Brown, Glenn Close, Danny Devito

What Movie?

Hint:  Jack Black gets owned in this sci-fi movie.


Actors in the Movie:  Milla Jovovich, David Duchovny, Natalie Portman, Billy Zane, Will Ferrell, Ellen Cleghorn, Cuba Gooding Jr.

What Movie?

Hint:  “I’m a Hand Jockey, Mama”


Actors in the Movie:  Bruce Willis, Ving Rhames, Julia Sweeney, Steve Buscemi, Eric Stoltz, Harvey Keitel, Christopher Walken

What Movie?

Hint:  (You probably don’t need one, so this one won’t be much help)

“Garcon means boy.”


Actors in the Movie:  Matt Damon, Severus Snape, Chris Rock, Selma Hayek, Jason Lee, Ben Affleck, Linda Fiorentino, George Carlin, Alannis Morissette

What Movie?

Hint:  Loki, Bartleby, Azrael


Actors in the Movie:  Rob Lowe, Robert Patrick, Ione Skye, Chris Farley, Ed O’Neill (Al Bundy), Lara Flynn Boyle, Tia Carrere

What Movie?


Hint:  (You probably got this one too) She will be mine. Oh, yes – she will be mine.


Actors in the Movie:  Paul Walker, Jeff Daniels, Joan Allen, Jane Kaczmarek, Tobey Maguire, “Wendy Peffercorn” Marley Shelton, Reese Witherspoon

What Movie?

Hint:  Black and white


Actors in the Movie:  Cary Elwes, Gary Oldman, Monica Bellucci, Anthony Hopkins, Winona Ryder, Keanu Reeves

What Movie?

Hint:  “Mina”  “See me now…”





1) Coneheads 2) Mars Attacks 3) Zoolander 4) Pulp Fiction 5) Dogma 6) Wayne’s World 7) Pleasantville 8) Bram Stoker’s Dracula

Missing Sequel? That’s Easy. How about SEQUELS?! Imagine the Three Amigos Trilogy

amigosThis topic is a no brainer; I’ve already brainstormed the sequel to the 1986 whimsical farce. Imagine, perhaps ten years have passed since the amigos defended the city of Santo Poco utilizing tactics from their movie, “ Amigos, Amigos, Amigos.” The Amigos have gone their separate ways. Lucky, a happily married sheriff, who’s longing for home is exemplified in the overly American-themed décor of his home and family. He is of course oblivious to his desire to see his former home.
Dusty Bottoms also yearns for home. We find him fishing off the coast in a small paddle boat. In a dismal storm he lands a giant Marlin, the beauty of which brings him to tears. As sharks swarm and devour his catch, he cries skyward, “I just want to go home!” (Or something like that.)
While it looks…bleak (?) for Dusty, Ned has been flourishing in Mexico. He has been defending the poor and wretched for years as the masked bandit, El Azul N. A vigilante and wealthy landowner, Ned has been anonymously fighting the likes of would be El Guapos. His anonymity is in question, however, due to his incredibly recognizable Caucasian skin and facial profile. He too longs for home; he has not wed, and desperately yearns for a family. In fact there are many rumors questioning the Azul N’s …masculinity.
The three Amigos reunite, only to run into Prohibition runners who have overrun a peaceful border town, and are shipping high quality Tequila to the dry states of America. The Amigos are forced into action again in order to defend justice.
No working title. (Sorry)

However the title to the third installment, a romp through time that has the amigos transported to the future, is now complete: The Three Amigos, Amigos In Time…